luni, 29 noiembrie 2021

I will be happy when ...

 








I will be happy when I have ...

I will be happy when I am ...

I will be happy when I find ...

I will be happy when I go ...

I'll be happy when I can ...


We constantly live in expectation of finally being able to be happy, as if happiness were a gift that falls from above like talents, something that sooner or later arrives, a predictable  event. We have become a society of procrastinators of happiness, so much so that we could define this procrastination as a syndrome, the syndrome of delayed happiness, to identify the behavior of a human being who is perpetually waiting for a certain specific circumstance to occur in order to be - finally happy.


We continually postpone our being happy to better times, delegating it to achieving this or that goal, until we have solved all our problems, in fact neglecting that one moment that will never return: the present moment. Yes, because it is now that life is consumed, now that the fate of the game is being played; not yesterday, not tomorrow, but now.


Everyone has bothered a bit on the passionate question of happiness and its research, from philosophers to directors and writers of various kinds, through scientists, to contemporary bloggers, youtubers and enlightened explanationists. Fundamentally, however, the concept of happiness remains quite abstract, often split between a hedonic and a eudaimonic perspective.


After all, if there was a universal recipe we would all be happy instead of getting angry like beasts in the morning at the incessant sound of the alarm clock or at the first intersection where our priority is not respected. Because you see dear readers, the only condition that happiness requires is that of not being conditioned. Happiness is never a "when", an "if" or even a "but". Happiness is not an effect, but a cause. It is not a consequence, but a choice.


Happiness is a word thrown from the moon, he doesn't know the reasons and doesn't care about the consequences. 



We are a society of procrastinators of happiness precisely because we foolishly set the conditions for it to occur and failing to reach it, we dedicate ourselves to the only thing we can manage: unhappiness. We are unhappy because we do not live the life we ​​want, because we are unable to appreciate what we have, unable to savor every moment of our day we are stubborn in the continuous search for what we do not have.


After all, what is the name of that thing that makes us believe that we will find happiness outside the confines of our skin, that convinces us that happiness can be produced, purchased and consumed like a piece of cheese? That universal deception is advertising, instilling illusions and selling smoke. According to the Polish philosopher and sociologist Zygmunt Bauman, what keeps the consumer society moving is precisely the perennial dissatisfaction; the more dissatisfied and unhappy a consumer is, the more he consumes. Isn't it tragicomic? Think about how much economy revolves around our unhappiness, we live in perfect symbiosis with the consumer goods market, we become what we buy, what we consume, we too are products, consumers consumed with barcodes tattooed on their asses.


We no longer realize that we are obsessed with the mirage of an ideal tomorrow while we are just talking about it, we have become not only procrastinators of happiness but also spreaders of fairy tales, immersed in a pathological fabulation we have paused our present and, consequently , our chance to be happy.


We lead a life that we do not like, that does not satisfy us yet, instead of taking the reins in hand, we prefer to postpone everything, continuously, after all it is so convenient to wait for tomorrow, and tomorrow again, so that things can fall from above, as if for miracle. Without realizing that we already have the miracle in our hands, a miracle called time that is given to us with each awakening, the most precious asset we have, so democratic and never taken for granted. But who has time to worry about time? 


"I don't have time to sit down for a moment, close my eyes, slow my breathing, ask myself if this is the life I wanted, understand if there is still something I can do to correct my aim, or at least try, at least try to build my way.

I have no time.


How strange we "modern" human beings are, we live with the conviction of being immortal, as if we had all the time in this world, we postpone existential issues and deal with the facade, with the frivolities that consume our time every day, making us tired , melancholy, perpetually dissatisfied and unhappy. We live badly, we feel bad, we eat badly, we sleep badly, we reason badly, we fuck badly, yet ... we do absolutely nothing to change, convinced that a miracle will save us first, that we will be happy when ...


No! That's not how it works. If there is a belief that I have developed about happiness, it is the absolute certainty that she is not meant to be delegated, postponed, conditioned or packaged. Happiness is not tomorrow, it is now. You don't discard it, you live it. You can't buy it, but you can choose it.

I'm not going to tell you that being happy is easy, because it's not. And I'm not even going to tell you that being happy means not giving a damn about the future, because I don't think so.


Happiness is a risk, I believe, it is the risk of coming face to face with your unhealthy habits, of discovering that there are people who shower you with negativity, it is the risk of shedding light on your gray areas, of feeling the song of your ancient voice, which rests inside you, under heaps of inner garbage and character rubble. Yes, happiness involves enormous risks and efforts, just as in nature nothing changes by chance, even your life cannot improve by chance, but through your present moment you can build a better future.


And life will continue to throw a spanner in the works even if you are happy, you know. There won't always be sunshine in your life. Don't be fooled by those who tell you that a happy life is all roses and flowers. We are happy despite the problems, despite the difficulties, even when the curses gush out like a sudden and torrential rain in mid-August, and if it is true that it cannot rain forever, it is also true that rain is needed, otherwise even more plants. beautiful and happy they would dry up if they remained perpetually under the sun. Accept the problems, the fucking unexpected, collect the "no", everything is rain, everything serves to unleash that inner wave that will make you feel alive and allow you to go through the darkest moments of your life, so you can model them on the shape of your happiness; because remember, happiness is always and only a choice, a way of being.